Saxton hale hat

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Saxton Hale is a daring Australian, President and CEO of Mann Co., and the star of many comics series. He is considered the fourth richest man in America. He was the sixth richest man in America, but surpassed the fifth by wealth and the fourth by killing him in a harpoon duel. His favorite pastimes include fighting, drinking, and battling with ferocious animals. In fact, most kids sleep with a teddy bear at night, but Saxton Hale sleeps with an actual bear that he tamed while in the Brazilian Jungles. His identifying features include a mustache, rippling muscles, a crocodile-tooth lined hat, a huge 12 inch cock, and a patch of rotating chest hair shaped like Australia. He also refuses to wear clothes on his upper body "for obvious reasons".

Saxton is the most current male of the Hale family to take up the reins of Mann Co. since Zepheniah Mann left its ownership to loyal aide and tracker Barnabas Hale in his last will and testament. His boisterous presence is felt in all areas of the company, from the slogan "We sell products and get in fights" to Gorilla Wrestling Fridays – his attempt at employee morale building. He also fills out customer forms with tick-boxes to either intimidate any product-thieving rivals or commend new inventors submitting a new product idea to him. His inspiring image is also featured on numerousMann Co. catalogs and promotional materials. He is known (and feared) for his belief in handling customer service issues personally, with his official policy being: "If you aren't 100% satisfied with our product line, you can take it up with me!"

Notable achievements

  • Cutting his way out of "primate hell".
  • Teaching his Girl Scout troop, the "Saxtonettes", fire safety tips such as "Grizzly bears burn".
  • Fighting off a lion while simultaneously having a haircut.
  • Single-handedly wiping out the Indonesian Berserker Shark (and making them cry).
  • Retrieving a stolen puck from a thieving tortoise despite its thirty minute head start.
  • Inventing Jarate, the JAR-Based karate.
  • Becoming the wealthiest man in the Western Hemisphere.
  • Becoming the fourth richest man in the world.
  • Firebombing Woodstock from a helicopter.
  • Being in no way involved with the explosive death of the American monkeynaut Poopy Joe, nor being anywhere near the launch site at the time.
  • Introducing the Crafting system to both the RED  and BLU teams in an effort to stop the war.
  • Publishing a special issued magazine (at a price of 20 cents per issue, even though it was demanded to be free) to answer questions made by his fans about, among other things, playing Team Fortress 2 on a Mac.
  • Discovering the existence of the Internet and starting the Mann Co. Store.
  • Purchasing England.
  • Having a website made up entirely of absolutely true Saxton Hale facts.
  • Killing the perverts at AnagramYourName.com.
  • Hosting the First Annual Saxxy Awards .
  • Inventing the "high-five".
  • Eating a whole ostrich.
  • 'Manslaughtering' 1593 physicians.
  • Defeating Dr. McNinja in a popularity contest.
  • Being the stongest hunk.

Mann Co. comics

Issue Comic Info

=== Saxton Hale's 
Mail Storm ===

Saxton Hale's Mail Storm had its first and only issue published in March 1964 to help explain the new Federal recall of all 36 million Gold Coast-Tweed personal apple corers, due to their tendency to not only core apples, but fingers, lamps, and small furry animals. When the government demanded the comic be issued for free, Mann Co. responded by raising its usual price of twelve cents an issue to twenty, reasoning that if anyone was going to get something for free, they were going to pay for it.

Issue #1

Saxton Hale's Mildly Thrilling Tales

As the youth movement of the 1960s escalated, manufacturers produced fewer and fewer products for the elderly. By 1963, only four items remained: hats , meat, caskets, and Saxton Hale's Mildly Thrilling Tales. Naked from the forehead down, lying in their coffins gumming Salisbury steak, an entire generation of despondent, forgotten consumers was left with just one thing on which to spend their government checks: Hale's tepid, senior-friendly tales of modest suspense. Saxton Hale Visits His Mother Monthly and Soothing Stories of Familiar Things soon followed. Hale quickly became the wealthiest man in the Western Hemisphere.

Issue #4

==Girl's Adventure Starring Saxton Hale==

Boy's Adventure with Saxton Hale came under fire from the Senate Subcommittee on Juvenile Delinquency in 1968 for teaching boys aged 6-16, among other things: moral turpitude, arson, vandalism, hippie assault, tax fraud, at-home laryngectomies, car theft, gorilla slaughter, how to be a pedophile, and the Heimlich Maneuver (which had just been invented and was still considered controversial). Pressured by the Senate, Mann Co. changed the name to Girl's Adventure With Saxton Hale, as it was commonly thought at the time that girls couldn't do anything, so any lessons taught to them would be harmless.

Issue #6

=== Saxton Hale's 
Barbershop Action ===

Saxton Hale's Barbershop Action capitalized on the brief "haircut" fad of the early 60s. Its breakaway success would lead to the ancillary titles Saxton Hale's Barbershop Romance and Haircut Horrors Starring Saxton Hale's Ghost. By Issue #40, however, the Peacenik movement had gripped America in its filthy, tangled mane, and haircut fiction saw a steep decline. This would be the start of a lifelong feud between Hale and hippies, which would culminate in his firebombing Woodstock from a helicopter.

Issue #12

=== Saxton Hale's 
Jungle Brawl ===

Saxton Hale's Jungle Brawl debuted in the U.S. in 1962, riding a wave of anti-gorilla sentiment following Russia's successful launch of the first monkey, Vladimir Bananas, into space. America's rage was not isolated to communist primates; that same year, monkeynaut Poopy Joe cruelly dashed the U.S.'s hopes of reaching the stars when its shuttle detonated on takeoff. Brawl was notorious for inflaming human-gorilla tensions during its ten-year run, most famously in issue #50, which was printed with gorillas' blood. Issue #50's print run of 17 million copies left only five gorillas on the planet.

Issue #44

=== Saxton Hale's 
Thrilling Tales ===

Saxton Hale's Thrilling Tales first arrived on newsstands in 1961 as part of a bold Mann Co. initiative to sidestep an increase on postage costs for their weapons catalogs. The first 64-page issue contained four pages of thrilling tales and sixty pages of ads for exciting new Mann Co. products. But Thrilling's editors quickly discovered that showing Mann Co. founder Saxton Hale using a product in the story itself tripled its sales. Ads were cut to 32 pages to accommodate longer, product placement-based stories.

Issue #55

Apple

During the Mac Update, a non-canon comic was released that contained Saxton Hale. In this comic, Saxton Hale smashes through the Apple store's window, as he proclaims that he is going to burn the store to the ground. Saxton picks up a nearby device, presses a button, and then blows up the Moon with the Apple store's product ("iBlewupthemoon"). The product impresses Saxton so much that he decides to purchase the company. However, a figure in a black sweater (presumably Apple CEO Steve Jobs in his trademark turtleneck) appears and declines the offer. Saxton instantly recognizes the man and insults his curvy designs. The comic ends with the title of the next issue When Titans Clash.

Hale mail

The lucky few who sent in the Force-A-Nature order form[1] received an invoice from Saxton Hale himself, sadly informing them that the requested item was out of stock. For compensation, the sender received a signed photo of Saxton Hale standing in front of Ayers Rock with the words "Thanks for writing, little fella!" and a keychain featuring a random Team Fortress 2 class. The letter also advised to keep an eye on their mailbox, as new products could be on the way.

Yet more lucky senders who mailed in the coupon[2] received a letter bearing the Mann Co. logo and the snarling face of Saxton Hale. Inside was a letter informing the recipient that the requested product(s) were out of stock and that they should continue to check their mailbox as new items/legislation could be on the way, as well as several postcards bearing random cover images from the Mann Co. comics.

At this point, Valve asked players not to send any more money due to legal reasons. Valve donated the money they had received to Child's Play.

Jungle Inferno

Saxton Hale also appears in Jungle Inferno movie from SFM. This was first appeared in Team Fortress 2.

Trivia

  • Saxton Hale's Thrilling Tales is illustrated by comic artist Mike Oeming.
  • Saxton Hale occasionally makes posts on the TF2 Official Website.
  • Saxton Hale's name is an anagram for a sexually explicit phrase that Valve may or may not have originally intended, as referenced in the Mann-Conomy Update.
  • Saxton Hale is implied to have been in a relationship with the Administrator some time ago, referring to her as a "chain-smoking seductress" and being on first name terms with her.
  • Saxton Hale has had a river named after his family.
  • In Poker Night at the Inventory, Saxton Hale makes a cameo appearance as the Ace of Spades in the Team Fortress 2 deck of cards.
  • A server mod called VS Saxton Hale allows one player, taking on the role of Saxton Hale on the BLU team, to fight against the rest of the players, who are all on the RED team. And, rather fittingly, he is usually equipped with strange fists that have reached the rank of "Hale's Own".
  • Saxton Hale's chest-hair changed shape into a Christmas tree during Australian Christmas.
  • Saxton Hale sent a letter to all Team Fortress 2 and Spiral Knights players on Steam requesting that the player go on a mission to reach the first Clockwork Terminal in Spiral Knights, in which if the player does, it leads to unlocking the Spiral Sallet hat.
  • Saxton had a moustache by the age of one, as seen in the poster for the Manniversary Update.
  • A child dresses as Saxton Hale during the Bombinomicon comic, in which the RED Heavy intimidates him until he cries.
  • While it is said that Saxton slept with a bear that he tamed in the Brazilian jungles, there aren't any kind of bears of any species in Brazil.
  • Saxton Hale, along with the Pyro, are playable characters in the game Super Time Force Ultra.

References

  1. ↑ http://www.teamfortress.com/scoutupdate/force-a-nature.htm The Scout Update - Day 5
  2. ↑ http://www.teamfortress.com/sniper_vs_spy/day04_english.htm The Sniper vs. Spy Update - Day 4

External links

Sours: https://teamfortress.fandom.com/wiki/Saxton_Hale

Saxton

Jungle Jackpot Collection

Anodized Aloha · Bamboo Brushed · Croc Dusted · Leopard Printed · Macaw Masked · Mannana Peeled · Park Pigmented · Piña Polished · Sax Waxed · Tiger Buffed · Yeti Coated

Infernal Reward Collection

Bank Rolled · Bloom Buffed · Bonk Varnished · Cardboard Boxed · Clover Camo'd · Dream Piped · Fire Glazed · Freedom Wrapped · Kill Covered · Merc Stained · Pizza Polished · Quack Canvassed · Star Crossed

Decorated War Hero Collection

Autumn Mk.II · Carpet Bomber Mk.II · Civic Duty Mk.II · Civil Servant Mk.II · Forest Fire Mk.II · Night Owl Mk.II · Plaid Potshotter Mk.II · Woodland Warrior Mk.II · Woodsy Widowmaker Mk.II · Wrapped Reviver Mk.II

Contract Campaigner Collection

Backwoods Boomstick Mk.II · Bovine Blazemaker Mk.II · Dead Reckoner Mk.II · Iron Wood Mk.II · Macabre Web Mk.II · Masked Mender Mk.II · Nutcracker Mk.II · Smalltown Bringdown Mk.II

Saxton Select Collection

Dragon Slayer

Sours: https://wiki.teamfortress.com/wiki/Saxton
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Saxton
Saxtonhat.png
RED BLU
Basic Information
Worn byAll classes
Equip region{{{equipregion}}}
Contributed byValve
ReleasedJungle Inferno Update
AvailabilityContract reward
TradableYes
GiftableYes
PaintableNo
NameableYes
Craft #?Yes

The Saxton is a community-createdcosmetic item for all classes. It is a wide-brimmed Akubra hat with crocodile teeth fitted in slots in the hatband and a small tear on the edge of the brim, similar to what Saxton Hale wears.

In order to get the Saxton hat, a player must complete the Brazil map contract in the maps section of the Jungle Inferno Contracts.

Sours: https://teamfortress.fandom.com/wiki/Saxton
[TF2] How 2 Saxton Hale

And they helped me just out of friendship, I explained, opening the champagne. You can't even drink a lot, they even have officers under the hood and are afraid of them. Ali, over there, promised to get me a leave of absence from the company commander.

Hale hat saxton

Stunningly bright stars is especially beautiful, the night sky here is surprisingly high, the colors of clear ultramarine, and these stunningly bright stars sparkle so enticingly and simply dazzlingly on the black velvet of heavenly crystal, you can admire them for hours, especially when the thin crescent crescent lies almost horizontally on tops of palm trees.

But then the night goes beyond the horizon and it began to dawn on the island. Golden fire lights by nimble salamanders The brave captain opened his eyes, waking up from the rays of the sun, playfully running over. His face and realized that he was still in this incredible fairy tale - they are now only together with the stunning beauty Alina on this uninhabited, but simply paradise island.

TF2; The Versus Saxton Hale Tier List

Internet I learn some initial information about them, and before everything else that they consider it necessary to tell (especially of an intimate nature, as was the case in the example the same Anna or a little later with Marina), it comes already during real meetings and between the next visits to sex. Galya turned out to be an exception to this series. Precisely in the sense that the information available about her of an intimate plan before our sex did not receive any detail and expansion even when we became.

As close as a man and a woman can be close.

Now discussing:

The sun began to hide behind the horizon and night began to fall. Artyom did not stay long and it began to bother her. She thought to leave, but felt a hand on her shoulder. It was he.



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